Friday, August 24, 2007
it has been a time since i have blogged. well, i am nt emo. i am just disappointed. today's gonna be different. english was average. but whenevere i say that, my results are equally disastrous (i wonder i had it spelt correctly) my paper one was screwed up. freedom. i didnt gave much details on how i got my freedom and expressions errors all over the place. den i had to rush cos i wasted too much time for planning. well, i guess i have to write more to practice. O levels is the real one.
had social studies and chinese today. social studies was average. wad a clever spotter am i. the topics tested were kind of expected. i chose sustaining development cos the qns are slightly easier den governance. i had this kind of feeling. everytime after a test or exam, i dun really know how much i will get. this makes me more nervous..
chinese was irritating. the teacher just wldnt give me the three papers. make life difficult for me. i think i wrote out of point. i wrote wadeva i like. im not surprise if i fail lah. cos i think i just retake chinese for fun. cos there are more impt subjects for me to concentrate. right camilia? haha
went to joel's house to mug after school. not really that successful. but we did something. we shared so much secrets and we plan to share it with the others when we are in jc and poly. haha. this can be a great chance for 12 sheng xiao gathering. xD
i amhaving my dinner soon.
all begins with frens, and i dun want to ruin this friendship. so smile and walked pass ur obstacles, cos smile is the my immunity to all the problems. xD
STORMcity!;
- 4:51 AM
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
it's been sometime. after so long, all the hard work, effort, and time. a b3. a pathetic b3. wads wrong with me? i dunno. i wonder, how could i even smile even i got such disgracing results? family problems, o lvl stress. all are stressing me up. im confused. i want to shout it out loud. but i dont have the energy to. home is a misery. to others, home is full of warmth, peace, tranquility. to me, home, is full of shouts, vulgarities, and stress. i hate it. it is not that i want to stay. but this is where i belong. ppl asking me, if im alright. frankly, i will say no even i will reply with a yes. i always believe home is a place for me, where my pillar of support is. but, i guess tat is wad i had always lied to myself. i hate vulgarities. i hate shouts. i hate stress. god oh lord, is this an obstacle u want me to overcome? this is wad i always believe whenever i break down.
i dun want to go around the neighbourhood, searching for someone in the midnight till 1am. someone who is dear to me. i dunno if u are a heartless freak or wad, she is your mother. is the word 'sorry' so difficult to come out from your mouth? everything started by wad u say. is it wrong to be sensitive? wad if a person is sensitive to some issues? are u going to shoot nasty comments and remarks at her? enjoying how she's suffering? u are a graduate. a grown up. an adult. why cant u at least try? do u still regard as this is ur family? do u? i really qns myself? in the midnight, searching high and low for mom together with dad. where were u? sleeping? i dunno. i came back home, u didnt seem u even cared. all u say. 'she's being very inconsiderate' are u being considerate when u say all those words? show some respect. no matter wad wrong she has made, she still your mom. u said before tat when u have the ability to buy a place, u will move out. what are u trying to imply?well, i dun blame u for wanting freedom. but somehow, u still must have the responsibility. sometimes she speak nonsensical stuffs. but is there a need for u to raise ur voice? are u tat immature and weak to lose control of ur mouth? there's a limit for everything. she stepped over yours, and u sound as if u are going to trample her to death. is tat all u want? is tat all u desire? is tat ur aim? i wonder if u ever felt love. i doubt u ever know nor u can understand tat.
i want to sleep my life through. never wake up. cos i want to live in a dream where i can feel happiness. . . . . .Labels: stopaskingquestion.
STORMcity!;
- 2:27 AM